


answers

by zuliamol



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Angst, Based on a True Story, F/F, fluff at first, it'll hurt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2019-01-20
Packaged: 2019-08-22 18:07:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16602965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zuliamol/pseuds/zuliamol
Summary: Hirai Momo gives all of her to this girl. Let's hope it ends well.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi. this will be a little long (oops).
> 
> it's based on a true story (mine!) so it'll be just like real life (kinda)

They knew each other for a while – or better, knew of each other’s existences. But the first time they actually spoke was at a Mexican restaurant when Nayeon, a mutual friend, decided to get all her friends for a “goodbye” party – she was going to travel for two months to somewhere in the Caribbean with her family, but, being the dramatic self she was, acted like she was never going to see her friends again. Momo didn’t complain, the food was good and liked the company of Nayeon - her self proclaimed best friend - and Sana. It was then that she saw the girl from her Psych class – Mina, if she remembered correctly. She was shy but was all smiles, always gentle and polite. Momo has always admired her looks from afar, but now seeing the girl up close and – almost – talking to her, Momo froze. Mina was beautiful.

 

 

Momo stuck around her closest friends during dinner, especially around Nayeon who sat next to her and got too drunk too fast. It was only after dessert – a giant churros cake Naeyon ordered – and after most of the guests left that Momo finally talked to Mina.

 

 

Momo was discussing, almost fighting, with Sana and Jeongyeon about which was the best k-pop girl group. Sana said GFriend, obviously. Jeongyeon said the classic was aways better, so Girl’s Generation. Momo defended Red Velvet and their modern and innovative concept. Mina slowly approached the three girls, leaving her spot at the other spot of the tables, and sat next to Jeongyeon, across Momo and Sana. Amidst the talking, Mina said “Mamamoo”.

 

 

“Eh?” Sana and Momo said confused and a bit surprised. Was Momo’s heart beating faster? She just must have been more scared than she thought, that was probably it.

 

 

“Mamamoo”, Mina repeated. “They have the best vocals of all girl groups, clearly. Not to mention they have one of the best girl rappers in the industry”.

 

 

A few moments of silence. The other girls pondered.

 

 

“Agreed. But I still don’t think you can compete against classics”, said Jeongeyon, downing what was left of her beer.

 

 

“Perhaps”, said Mina, downing her water and trying to hide her embarrassment and anxiety from talking to the other girls. Was it Momo’s impression or did Mina get ten times cuter when she was nervous?

 

 

“I didn’t know you liked k-pop, Mina”, Sana said, tilting her head a little to the side.

 

 

“I was obsessed with it when I was younger”, she explained. “Now I listen to it less, but I still like it”.

 

 

Momo couldn’t take her eyes off Mina, and the latter was starting to notice. But as much Momo tried, she didn’t find enough strength to turn her eyes away. Mina was so _elegant_ – Momo thought this was the best word to describe her.

 

 

“Jeongyeon!” Nayeon called from the restaurant’s register.

 

 

“I think she needs change again”, said Sana while Jeongyeon rolled her eyes.

 

 

“Let’s go see what’s up before they ban her from here”. Jeongyeon and Sana got up to rescue a still slightly drunk Nayeon.

 

“Why do you like Mamamoo so much?” Momo asked Mina after the other girls left the table.

 

 

“Why do you like Red Velvet so much?” Mina retorted and smiled and then tried to hide her smile and red cheeks with her hands.

 

 

All Momo managed to do was smile. This girl captivated her, and Momo wanted to know all of her.

 

 

“Fair enough”, Momo said finally.

 

 

Mina wiggled her eyebrows, enjoying winning this small fight and laughed at herself. Momo joined her. Their gaze met and Mina kept smiling, but Momo was so impressed by  the curves of her smiled she just stared at her.

 

 

“Let’s bail”, Nayeon appeared, followed by Sana and Jeongyeon, and interrupted the japaneses girls stare-off.

 

 

“Almost everybody has bailed, Nayeon”, Jeongyeon said a little irritated by her roommate.

 

 

“Speaking of that, wasn’t Dahyun here just now?” Sana asked, a little worried for her girlfriend.

 

 

“Oh, she told me she went to the restroom but…” Mina answered but trailed off, looking for her friend who was talking to her before she joined the k-pop discussion.

 

 

Right away, Dahyun appeared on the sidewalk and wavef to the group of friends. The other girls, confused, got up and left the restaurant, going towards a Dahyun that seemed to be hiding something behind her back.

 

 

“What is this girl up to now, dear God?” Sana whispered as they walked. Momo chuckled.

 

 

“I thought of buying Nayeon a goodbye bouquet, but ended up getting one for my Shy Shy Shy Sana too and, well--” Dahyun was interrupted by a double hug from her girlfriend and Nayeon, almost kneading the bouquets Dahyun had just secretly bought.

 

 

“Dahyunnie, I love you!” Sana and Nayeon said at the same time, making everyone laugh.

 

 

“This is getting too gross, now”, Jeongyeon said after looking at all the lovey dovey things going on.

 

All the other five girls basically tackled her, giving her a really tight group hug.

 

 

“Aah! Get away! Away!” Jeongyeon yelled and pushed her friends away.

 

 

“Ok, enough. I want to walk”, Nayeon said.

 

 

“You always want to walk when you get drunk…” Dahyun said.

 

 

“Exactly. Now shut up and walk with me”.

 

 

And so they did. After a while, Momo realized Mina was slowly walking behind the group.

 

 

“Hey, are you ok?” Momo approached Mina.

 

 

“Eh? Oh, yeah, I’m fine. It’s just that… I don’t know. Maybe I should get going, right?”

 

 

“What do you mean?”

 

 

“I don’t know. I’m not very close to you or Jeongyeon, I think you guys would have more fun if I just left”

 

 

_Please don’t go, I haven’t gotten your phone number yet._

 

 

“No, c’mon! Don’t say silly stuff like that. Here, let’s talk, you’ll see we have more in common than just Nayeon as a friend”, Momo said extending her hand for Mina to catch and take her to the rest of the girls.

 

 

Outside, Momo was smiling. Inside her head, she was screaming and dying and praying Mina would hold her hand so she wouldn’t look like a buffoon.

 

 

Mina looked from her hanging hand to her face.

 

 

“Ok”, she said softly and grabbed Momo’s hand, letting her pull her to where Jeongyeon and Nayeon pretended to fight, rolling around on the street.

 

 

“Yah! What are you guys doing? You’ll scare Mina here”, Momo said to the older girls.

 

 

“I’m scared”, Dahyun said, looking terrified under Sana’s arms, who just laughed at the two girls wrestling.

 

 

Mina laughed. Momo almost didn’t believe it. She fell in love with that soft laugh and joined the other Japanese girls, laughing uncontrolledly at the girls on the ground, as Dahyun looked worried.

 

 

Talking to Mina was easier than she had thought. They shared a lot of opinions, their home country and music taste. They talked all throughout the walk. It was just a little _too_ easy, Momo thought.

 

 

“We’re here”, Nayeon said suddenly.

 

 

The girls looked around, not knowing where they were because they were too distracted with conversation.

 

 

Apparently, they were in front of a milkshake store that, apparently, stayed open until 1 a.m.

 

 

“Nayeonnie, we just had a massive cake you sure you want to have milkshake right now?” the voice of reason, Jeongyeon, asked.

 

 

“Yes” Nayeon answered immediately. The girls followed her inside. Momo didn’t complain a bit about another opportunity of food.

 

 

“What do you mean you don’t like Black Pink???” Momo said, unbelieving Mina’s revelation.

 

 

“That’s why I didn’t want to say anything…” Mina said regretful, finishing her strawberry milkshake.

 

 

“Yeah, you really shouldn’t have said anything”.

 

 

And that was how the night followed. Sana and Dahyun speaking absurdities, the girls laughing and Momo hypnotized by Mina’s smile.

 

 

The six girls awaited for their Uber lifts. Sana and Dahyun would go to Sana’s place – Dahyun argued that the bed over there was more comfortable. Nayeon tried to keep Jeongyeon awake until their lift got there and Jeongyeon regretted having Nayeon as her roommate and best friend. Momo and Mina still talked about everything and nothing, each one waiting for their ride.

 

 

The couple left first. Then the roommates. But, before Nayeon got into the car, she whispered to Momo “you can thank me later for getting you together”, gazed at Mina for a split second and then winked to Momo before getting into the car and disappearing into the night. Momo didn’t even have time to react.

 

 

 

 

A few moments later, Mina’s ride got there. Momo started rambling nonsense thins, her anxiety getting to her throat. She wanted to ask for Mina’s number but didn’t want to seem douchey. The younger girl just watched the scene unfold and smiled, really having fun.

 

 

While Momo babbled and tripped over her words, Mina took a small piece of paper from her pocket and a pen from her purse. She wrote her phone number on it and gave it to Momo, who went quiet immediately.

 

 

“Text me when you get home safe and sound”, the younger one said smiling and then got into the car without saying another word and without letting Momo say anything.

 

 

Momo looked at that piece of paper and brought it over her chest like it was the most precious thing in the world – and, in that moment, it was.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Momo can't stop looking at her phone, waiting for a notification.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a short one. a happy one.

“I texted her”

 

“What?”

 

“I fucking texted her”

 

“Who? Mina?”

 

Momo nodded.

 

“Already? It’s been not even 12 hours”

 

“I couldn’t help it, sorry. She’s just so… ugh!”

 

Momo threw herself onto the couch. Jeongyeon started petting her hair.

 

“You know, it is completely normal to have a crush, right?”

 

“Who has crush?” Nayeon asked as she got into the apartment with groceries.

 

“Momo has a crush on Mina” Jeongyeon said before Momo could even think.

 

“Oh, I already knew that”

 

“She texted her”

 

“Already? Damn, Momo, I thought you knew better”

 

Momo groaned.

 

“Ok, now this is bullying. I’m hungry” Momo said whiny. 

 

“I brought food, don’t worry” Nayeon started pulling out three udon bowls, Momo's comfort food.

 

 

* * *

 

_hey, it’s Momo!_

**sent, 13:08**

_i watched the new mamamoo mv you mentioned_

**sent, 13:09**

* * *

 

Momo was getting anxious. Why wouldn’t Mina reply? Maybe she was having a more exciting Sunday than Momo.

 

_buzz buzz_

Momo jumped at the sound of her phone vibrating and grabbed it.

 

 

* * *

 _Hey, Momo! Sorry I took so long, I was running._

 

_Really?? What did you think of it?_

**15:02**  

* * *

 

 

 

Momo almost screamed. She was beaming and jumping around her apartment. She tried to control herself and wait a few minutes to text back. But she couldn’t.

 

 

* * *

 

_honestly, i liked it more than i could've imagined. they're great_

**sent, 15:03**

* * *

Momo hugged her phone and waited for a reply. Maybe MIna was taking a shower. Momo didn't really care, she was happy enough that she didn't get ignored or ghosted. 

 

They texted all Sunday about k-pop, life and what they were eating; it was easy with Mina. Momo discovered that maybe Mina was starting to like Black Pink and Red Velvet more, she was proud of converting her. She also discovered that Mamamoo was indeed very great and she couldn’t deny that their vocals were unique. Momo mentally punched herself for liking something only because Mina did. But she didn’t care, she was all smiles.

 

It was 2 a.m. and they were still texting.

 

* * *

 

_omg no! asjfahkahha it’s not that bad!!_

**sent, 2:16**

* * *

 

No reply. About 20 minutes had passed. She didn’t even read it. Momo was starting to freak out again. Maybe she scared her. Maybe she didn’t even liked her. Mina hated her. That was the logical conclusion Momo had reached.

 

* * *

 

_Hahahah c’mon!_

_Sorry, I kind of fell asleep hahah_

**2:44**

* * *

 

 

Momo felt kinda bad for keeping the girl awake. It was a Sunday and they both had classes in the morning.

 

* * *

 

 

 _sorry for keeping you up.._ **  
**

_we should both go to sleep i guess hahah_

**read, 2:45**

 

 

 

_Maybe we should hahah_

_Good night, Momoring_

**2:46**

 

_good night, minari_

**read, 2:36**

* * *

 

They already had nicknames for each others. _How cute are we?_

 

Momo jumped up and down her bedroom, happy from just remembering what just happened. Her heart was beating so fast her chest almost couldn't keep it inside of her. She decided to have some tea before going to sleep to calm down.

 

She almost couldn't drink her tea from smiling way too much. 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a lot of exams and tests coming up so i wrote this quite quickly. it's cute tho, isn't it?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mina is confusing.

Momo saw her in their Psych class. She wanted to sit next to Mina so bad, but she was nervous to approach her – especially on a Monday and even more when she got barely 5 hours of sleep.

 

She saw an old friend of hers, Chaeyoung, whom she made friends with in the first days of college, but drew away after meeting Naeyon and Sana. Chaeyoung was sitting directly in front of Mina’s seat – who was absent in that moment. The perfect excuse to sit closer to Mina.

 

“Hey guys, I think I’m gonna catch up with Chae today. See you at lunch” Momo said to Sana and Jeongyeon, whom she’d usually sit with in classes. They nodded and said “ok”, kind of confused.

 

“Hey, Chaeyoung”, Momo said softly approaching the Korean girl.

 

“Oh, hey”, Chaeyoung replied as softly, having to get her head up from whatever she was doodling. “What’s up?”

 

“Oh, just you know, wanted to catch up with a friend I haven’t really talked to in a while…?” Momo was starting to get insecure and nervous again.

 

Chaeyoung smiled.

 

“Sit by my side, then, old pal”, Chaeyoung said hitting Momo’s shoulder lightly, a glint of excitement in her eyes.

 

Momo did as she was told and settled on the seat next to Chaeyoung just as Mina got into the classroom.

 

Momo didn’t know why but her heart started beating faster and her palms got sweaty.

 

“Hi, Momoring”, Mina said with a smirk.

 

“Momoring?” Chaeyoung asked looking between the two Japanese girls.

 

“Just a nickname she gave me”, Momo explained. “Hello, Minari” Momo replied to Mina with another smirk.

 

Chaeyoung looked like she wanted to know more, but the professor entered the classroom and they all went quiet.

 

Momo and Mina kept stealing glances throughout the class.

 

 

“So you’re really head over heals for her, huh?” Jeongyeon teased at luch.

 

Momo rolled her eyes.

 

“Ooh, did something happen?” Nayeon asked through the FaceTime call.

 

“Momo ditched us to sit next to Mina in Psych”

 

“Oh yeah, she’s totally in love”

 

Momo groaned loud, but didn’t say a word. Mostly because she was tired, but also because she knew they were kind of righ – _kind of_.

 

 

And, slowly, Momo started sitting next to Chaeyoung more often, not only getting closer to a stranded friend, but also making a new one, Tzuyu, a quiet and tall Taiwanese girl. Not to mention the fact that she talked to Mina almost every day, whether at school or over texts.

 

“So, have you made a move yet?” Sana asked on weekend at hers and Dahyun’s place - they ultimately decided to move in together. 

 

“What do you mean?” Momo said.

 

“I mean have you like asked her on a date or something?”

 

“… no?”

 

“You haven’t made a move yet??” Dahyun asked from the kitchen.

 

“Not exactly, but…” Momo started.

 

“No buts. You’re going to call her now and ask her out” Sana demanded.

 

Momo groaned.

 

“Can’t I just text her?”

 

“Ok, that works”, Sana agreed.

 

 

* * *

 

_hey mina, are you busy right now?_

**read, 21:09**

_Hello_

_Not really, what’s up?_

**21:11**

_i have to ask you something_

**read, 21:12**

_Shoot_

**21:15**

_would you maybe like to go out with_

_me sometime soon?_

**sent, 21:17**

* * *

 

“Oh my god I can’t believe I did that. Holy fucking shit. Ohmygodohmygodohmygod. What do I do now? Holy fuuuuuuuuuck. What if she says no? Oh fuck I think I’m having a panic attack. No. I’m having a full blown heart attack. Dahyun, call an ambulance.”

 

“Momo, chill. You just asked her out, it’s not that big of a deal…” Sana – unsuccessfully – tried to calm the Japanese girl.

 

“It’s not that big of deal? Sana, you know that I--”

 

_buzz buzz_

Momo jumped to get her phone that was on the couch.

 

* * *

 

 _Are you, Hirai Momo, asking me on_ _a date?_

**21:19**

_‘Cause if you are…_

_I happily accept it_

**21:20**

* * *

 

 

Momo almost passed out.

 

She went on a date with Mina the next weekend. They had coffee at a cafe. Momo drank her cup with a straw. Mina got a little mad that she was wasting plastic and killing animals in the sea. Momo argued that, with a straw, the coffee wouldn't burn her tongue. Mina let her keep her straw, wanting Momo's tongue to be intact for later. She smirked and Momo thought she would pass out again. The coffee burned her tongue anyways.

 

They kissed. It was timid at first, mostly because both girls were very shy and nervous. But it grew into something deeper. Mina felt the slight burn on Momo's tongue and smiled, then drew the kiss deeper and deeper, until they were both out of breath. Momo's hip were also hurting from leaning inside the car, pressing her torso on the gearshift.

 

"Take me to your place" Mina whispered on her right ear, sending shivers down Momo's neck.

 

She happily obliged. 

 

Things moved quickly, maybe to make up for the two weeks of just talking in class and in texts. A minute after getting inside Momo's apartment, they were already on her bed. The older girl on top of Mina and kissing her necks with soft bites.

 

"Momo, please. I want you..." Mina barely whispered under Momo, who smirked and moved down to please the younger girl. 

 

They slept together - in both meanings. They were tangled and sweating, but they didn't care, as long as they were close. 

 

Momo woke up first. Smiled widely seeing the Japanese girl sleeping peacefully in her bed. She decided to make breakfast and wake her up later. She only had eggs in her fridge, so she scrambled them and then made some coffee. 

 

"Minari", Momo whispered, running her hands up and down the smaller girl's back. "I made breakfast".

 

Mina woke up, blinking her eyes to get used to the brightness of the day.

 

"That's good", the still half-asleep girl said, sitting up.

 

"C'mon, let's eat"

 

They had breakfast, but Mina seemed a little distant. Momo didn't ask, maybe that was just the way Mina was in the mornings. There was still a little bit of pain in the back of her heart, but she tried to push it away and drink her coffee.

 

"I think I'll get going. Thanks for breakfast, Momoring", Mina smiled softly. Momo was a bit reliefed. Maybe she was just a little paranoid and things were good.

 

"Of course", Momo smiled back. "Are you walking home?"

 

"No, I think I'll call an Uber. Don't worry, I'll be fine" Mina chuckled. Maybe things were actully great between them.

 

Mina's ride arrived after a few minutes.

 

"Well, bye Minari", Momo said opening the door.

 

"Bye, Momo"

 

Momo took the opportunity and leaned in for a kiss. Mina turned her head and Momo kissed her cheek. The younger girl curved up her lips in a fake smile and her eyes were looking down. And, just like that, Mina was gone, leaving a confused and hurt Momo back. Her chest clenched and she felt her eyes getting wet. 

 

 _What did just happen? What the fuck was that?_ That was all Momo could think at the moment. 

 

She slowly closed the door and headed to the couch. She turned on her TV and watched some stupid drama, hugging her knees and trying to not overthink. 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing this hurt.. remember that this is based on my life haha! love reliving traumas!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Momo is a mess

“No, you are not going to sit next to her again”, Jeongyeon said angrily.

 

“But I need to know if we are ok”, Momo argued.

 

“After what she’s done?” Jeongyeon hissed. Momo looked hurt. "Just… give her some space”, the older girl said pinching her nose bridge in annoyance.

 

“No. I’m going to talk to her” Momo said already leaving, not letting Jeongyeon say anything.

 

“Momo! How are you pal?” Chaeyoung said as Momo got closer to their usual spot in Psych class.

 

“Good, I think. And how are you?” Momo answered looking for Mina.

 

“Oh, just you know, living” Chaeyoung followed the Japanese girl’s gaze. “She’s not here yet. I think she’ll be late. Sit down, though. I like talking to you”

 

Momo sat down in front of Chaeyoung, who was a good distraction throughout class. Mina skipped Psych class that morning. Momo sighed. Maybe she’d get another chance to talk to her.

 

 

“Hey, Chae! Come sit with us” Momo called during lunch.

 

“Oh, is that your new friend?” Dahyun asked.

 

“Yeah, kinda”

 

“Hey. Excuse me, guys” Chaeyoung said taking a seat at the table where the four girls were. “My lunch buddies skipped school today”

 

“Tzuyu didn’t come too?” Momo asked. Chaeyoung shook her head, looking sad.

 

“Maybe they all planned it!” Sana said with a finger up.

 

“Sure, babe” Dahyun smiled lovingly to the Japanese girl.

 

The couple and Chaeyoung were getting along nicely, Chaeyoung and Dahyun were for sure going to be best friends later. Momo, on the other hand, grew very quiet.

 

“It’s her, right?” Jeongyeon asked.

 

“Huh? Who?” Momo woke up from her daze.

 

“Mina. That’s why you’re sad, right?”

 

“Oh, no. Not at all” Momo lied.

 

Sana and Dahyun left the table, probably to make out before the next period.

 

“You got it bad, huh?” Chaeyoung turned to Momo.

 

“What?”

 

“It’s pretty fucking clear you’re head over heels for Mina”. Jeongyeon nodded in agreement.

 

Momo looked between the two girls. She knew it wasn’t just a crush. She knew the two girls were right. But why couldn’t she admit it? Why did it hurt so much thinking about her? Thinking about that morning? Thinking about the attempted kiss? Her chest hurt too much and she cleared those thoughts away. It was better not to think.

 

“Ok. Maybe”, Momo said softly, not wanting the Universe to hear and screw things up even more.

 

The two Korean girls chuckled and looked at each other.

 

“You know, I like you Chaeyoung”, Jeongyeon said out of the blue. The younger girl blushed. Jeongyeon turned to Momo. “Why didn’t you introduce her before?”

 

“I… I don’t know I just…” Momo shrugged.

 

“Oh shit, it’s already 13:20, we gotta go!” Chaeyoung interrupted Momo’s babbling and they all ran to their next classes.

 

 

Momo was laying on her couch and looking at her phone, more specifically at Mina’s contact photo, wondering if she should text her and give up her dignity or keep it and go to sleep.

 

After a few minutes she just said “fuck it” and texted her.

 

* * *

 

_hey, didn’t see you today in class_

_you ok?_

**sent 21:43**

* * *

 

 

Momo almost regretted it, but again decided not to think about it and pretended she didn’t care.

 

Mina didn’t respond for a few minutes, even though she was online when she sent the text. Momo sighed. Cooked whatever in her kitchen and turned on the TV and tried to not think of the girl.

 

_buzz buzz_

Momo closed her eyes and didn’t move, afraid of the response. Her hands were still itching to grab her phone.

 

_buzz buzz_

“Dammit” she hissed and grabbed her phone.

 

* * *

 

_Hello_

_Yeah, I’m fine. Just didn’t feel like going today_

**22:16**

* * *

 

And that was it. Just that. Not their usual crazy text laughs or bickering.

 

Momo ran her hands over her hair and again tried not to think too much into it.

 

* * *

 

_oh i get it hahah_

_glad you’re fine tho_

**sent, 22:18**

* * *

 

No response. Momo gave up on waiting and decided to finally go to sleep. She pretended to not know why a tear scrolled down her face and ignored her feelings to get a good night of sleep.

 

She didn’t sit next to Mina or Chaeyoung that week. Mina went to classes normally but didn’t even look at Momo, who took that as a clue to not bother her any longer. Jeongyeon put a comforting hand on Momo’s shoulder, somehow knowing what was going on.

 

Chaeyoung started sitting with her and her group of friends during lunch, though. Jeongyeon talked to her more and more and Momo was happy for them, seeing the soft gaze from Chaeyoung.Sana rolledher eyes every time one of them said something cheesy, but she was also happy Jeongyeon was finally talking to someone. Momo smiled, but it still kind of hurt moving her lips ever since _that_ morning.

 

At the end of the week, Momo looked at Mina’s contact photo one more time and then at herself on the mirror. Done. She was done with it all. Tired of wondering what happened, if she did something wrong. Done with the pain. She locked her phone and threw it on the bed behind her. She sighed at the reflection.

 

She noticed she wasn’t that sad anymore. She was angry. Mad. Furious. Both at herself and at Mina.

 

“Fuck her”, she barely whispered.

 

Momo ran her hands through her hair and smiled genuinely for the first time that week.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Momo isn't as fine as she thinks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smoking and drinking mentioned.

Apparently, Momo wasn't done. She couldn't help staring at Mina, because how could she? She was gorgeous and so simply elegant. The way she talked to people, the way she laughed with so much posture - Momo couldn't really relate to that.

Momo was frustrated. Why couldn't she forget Mina? Why couldn't she follow through what she said that night? _Fuck her_. She told that to herself almost everyday after class now.

The thing is, she _couldn't_ fuck her, and the problem was that she didn't know why. She didn't know what happened. Where did she go wrong?

And why couldn't she just let go? Get a good night of sleep and call it a day?

She mulled all of this again after Psych class. She then realized she didn't even know what the professor was saying or in which class she was.

She looked around and found Jeongyeon deeply focused in this class, but she caught the Japanese girl's gaze and leaned into her to whisper.

"You ok?"

Momo just shrugged and sighed.

"Is it the Mina thing?"

Momo hesitated, but eventually nodded.

The professor looked at them.

"We'll talk after class ok?"

Momo nodded once more.

\--

"Hey, if you could text me your notes later I'd deeply appreciate it, Jeong. Kind of zoned out today, sorry"

"Yeah, sure" Jeongyeon said, still putting her stuff back in her bag. "So hey, what's up? You know, with that Mina situation?"

Momo sighed. "It's not a situation if there's nothing happening, is it?"

"Oh, so that's what's wrong, ok. You're upset because she rejected you?"

"She didn't reject me, that's the thing. She just completely wiped me out of her life, it's like I didn't even matter, you know? It sucks... Being left in the dark like that..."

Jeongyeon looked down. She didn't know how to respond; she's never been in that kind of situation or heard of something like that. Yeah, she's heard of ghosting, but that didn't sound like Mina. Mina was polite and kind, and not this cold stone heart bitch Momo was describing. It just didn't add up.

"Well, I don't really know what to say, but I do can buy you some coffee"

"You're the best person I know and I love you Jeongyeon"

"Jesus, keep it in your pants"

\--

"Ugh, I miss Nayeon" Jeongyeon said after setting two cups of coffee int he table.

"So I'm also not enough for you, huh?" Momo teased taking a sip of coffee

"Oh, shut up. I just miss her"

Momo nodded.

"Hm, I miss her too..."

The door bell chimed in and that made Momo look around the cafe. Just university students getting a break after class, looking as tired as her and... Is that Mina? Sitting with a girl and... Laughing and playing with her hair?

"Hey, do you know who's that?"

"Huh? Oh, that's Jihyo, why- Oh gosh, Momo, just stop thinking about her, they're probably just friends"

"Just friends? Look at how shy Mina is! They're clearly flirting"

"Mina is always shy. Besides, what difference does it make?"

"Jesus, thanks for the comfort, friend"

"Sorry... Just... Drink your coffee and have fun with me, please??"

"Ok, fine. Only if you tell me more about this Jihyo girl later"

They managed to have fun and talk about things besides school or Mina, it was mostly about Nayeon and how much they miss her. Momo missed her best friend, but Jeongyeon had this spark in her eyes whenever Nayeon was merely mentioned and Momo thought of how cute they'd be as couple - wait, what about Chaeyoung?

"Ok, now spill the tea, sis" Momo said when they started walking to their dorms.

"About Jihyo?" Jeongyeon rolled her eyes. "I don't know much about her, honestly. I didn't even know her and Mina were acquainted. I have useless tea, sis"

"I'm going to snap"

"Try asking Chaeyoung. She's close to Mina. Ugh! Why am I even encouraging you? Just drop it"

"Not so soon, friend"

\--

Momo got to her Psych class extra early the next day and waved at Chaeyoung to sit next to her, whom obliged happily.

Mina wasn't too far behind and the look on her face when she saw Chaeyoung sitting next to Momo was priceless. She was lost. After calculating what to do, she went to sit near Tzuyu.

"What's up, old friend?" Chaeyoung asked as she sat down.

"Oh, not much. Hey, do you know about Jihyo?"

"Park Jihyo? Yeah, I know about her, why?"

"Oh, it's just that... I have class with her and I need her help, but I'm too shy to approach her" Momo lied. Chaeyoung wouldn't tell her anything if she uncovered her real reasons.

"Oh, I got you. Mina and I met her a couple of months ago at a party, she's really nice and charming. And warm. You should just talk to her, really"

"Ok, I'll try, thanks" Momo still needed more. "So you met her at a party, huh?"

"Yeah, Mina actually really enjoys house parties, surprisingly. I think they made out at that party, I don't know, I was drunk anyway"

She was right! They weren't just friends. Now... What would Momo do with such information?

The professor started class early, ceasing their little gossiping and, more than ever, Momo was frustrated.

Two months ago? That wasn't too long before Momo and Mina slept together. Was Momo just a rebound? And now Mina and Jihyo got back together? Or were they dating and made it official just now? Was Momo her bachelor party?

_Get a grip, Hirai._

She didn't. In fact, as soon as the class ended she darted to the door and to the closest restroom. She was crying. She was a spiriling mess.

She didn't know why she was this emotional - she did, and it was because she fell in love with Mina hard and fast and now that she was being completely ignored by her she didn't know what to do or how to feel. She needed answers.

\--

"Momo? God, you look like a mess"

Momo tried to walk home, but for some reason her body didn't want to leave the school's patio. Sana had found her.

"I am a mess, Sana. A huge fucking mess"

Sana looked pensative, weighing her options.

"You know what you need? A party"

"What? No, Sana, I just-"

"Shush! Just follow me, my friend. We'll go to my place, have some food and then go to this cool party the guys from the Music Institute are throwing"

Momo didn't know how to respond, so she just followed her friend.

\--

"Do I look good?"

"Momo, that's the third time you ask this. Yes, you look great, just like you did in those other two outfits" Sana answered, getting a little annoyed.

"Yeah, you look great, Momo" Dahyun chimed in.

"Ok, thanks guys" Momo sighed. "I guess I'll wear this, I'm already tired anyway"

"Finally! Now do _we_ look good?"

"Yeah, you guys look hot"

"Told you, Sana. We look HOT!"

"Gosh, you sound like a frat boy, baby"

"And you love this frat boy"

Momo zoned out after that. Maybe they were making out by now, she didn't know or wanted to. She just wanted to go to this party. She had a feeling that Chaeyoung would be there and she knew the kid had weed on her. Wait, if Chaeyoung was there, would Mina also be?

Momo shook her head. She just wanted to have fun and forget about the girl, and not think about her. That's not what the night was about.

"Ok, everyone ready?"

They reached the party and after bumping and pushing a whole lot of people, Momo spotted Chaeyoung and Tzuyu.

"Hey, Momo!" Chaeyoung greeted. "Didn't know you'd be here"

"Yeah, Sana kind of dragged me"

"Heh, that makes sense. I was just about to go outside smoke, want to join?"

"Yeah, sure, I'll just let Sana and Dahyun know"

"Of course! Oh, Tzuyu, don't you wanna hang out with them for a bit? Just until I come back?"

"Y-yeah sure" the tall girl answered hesitantly.

After doing the whole introducing thing between the three girls, Momo and Chaeyoung went outside to smoke.

"Are you sure Tzuyu is going to be fine?" Momo asked as they walked.

"Yeah, I do this at every party so I guess she's already used to. She'll be fine"

"Ok, if you say so..."

The pair found a little place not too far from the house to light the blunt Chaeyoung had brought. Momo took a long hit,wanting to feel numb ad fast as she could.

"Damn, Momo! Didn't take you as a pot head. And you didn't even cough... Badass"

Momo passed the blunt. "I don't smoke very often, but it's not my first time, yeah"

Her throat burned and she almost coughed but she didn't care. She just wanted to get away.

"You know, you look like you want to scape. That's dangerous, just watch out"

"What do you mean?" Another hit.

"When you smoke to scape, you'll eventually try heavier shit because you'll get used to this. I've seen it before"

"Just tonight, Chae. Just tonight"

Another hit.

"Ok, you do you, boo. And don't worry, I'll be here to catch you when you get fucked up"

Momo laughed and couldn't stop. It was hitting her already.

"Jesus, this is strong"

"Just the best for my friends, you know?"

Momo couldn't stop laughing.

They went back inside after a while, already high off their heads, staring at everything and laughing at nothing.

"There you are, Momo-chan! Oh, are you high?" Sana's voice was way too loud for Momo to take at the moment.

"Yeah, just shut up, please. I- I'm going to find a corner for me"

"Ok... Just meet me in the car at 3, ok?"

"Yeah, yeah"

Momo went to the backyard and scavenged for a safe spot where she could just sit down in peace.

She spotted a wood bench behind the pool house. It was dark and quiet, just perfect.

She was just enjoying her trip and the feeling of numbness when she spotted a familiar face. Mina. She was there. And so was Jihyo, giggling and following her. They were probably also looking for a quiet place near the pool house, but they stopped in their tracks when they saw Momo on the bench.

"Momo?" Mina asked, clearly tipsy.

"You know this girl, Minari?" Jihyo asked, also tipsy.

Minari. No one called her Minari, only Momo did. Momo used to.

"Yeah, she's my... Friend"

"Oh, hello, then - what was it? - Momo?"

"Yeah, I'm Momo. Hi"

Mina and Momo stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity.

"Oooooh, hold on. Momo, are you high? I want to get high" Jihyo stumbled on her words.

"Yeah, and I don't have any, sorry"

"It's ok. We'll leave you alone, now" Mina cut in and Jihyo seemed upset. Momo tried not to send her a death glare out of politeness, but it was difficult given her state.

"Wait, Mina!" Momo called once they turned around. Mina looked at her with a mix of expectancy and annoyance. "I- I like your socks"

Mina looked down at her Mona Lisa socks. "Thanks". It was barely a whisper.

And just like that, she left. Again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back...? Just finished high school and finally got my creative juices back!! Hope you like it :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Momo tries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can't seem to be able to write long chapters, i don't know what's wrong with me.

" _Weed_?"

 

  
"Please, Dahyun, not now..."

  
  
"You smoked _marijuana_?!" Dahyun almost yelled.

  
  
"Yeah, just calm down, Sana is sleeping"

  
  
"You smoked the devil's plant?" Dahyun hissed now, not as calm as Momo expected.

  
  
"Jesus, it's not that big of a deal"

  
  
"Don't bring Jesus into this"

  
  
Momo rolled her eyes.

  
  
"Look at me: I smoked last night and I'm fine. Now, Sana, who got shitface drunk, is like dying on the couch right now. She can barely walk" 

  
  
"You're 'fine'? C'mon, we found you sobbing next to the car, you are not fine"

  
  
"It's just- agh!" Momo rubbed her temples and closed her eyes. She didn't want to talk about this now, specially not with Dahyun - she'd have to tell her everything. But she didn't want to leave her friend on the dark, not like Mina. "Mina was there"

  
  
"Oh" Dahyun seemed to get it somehow.

  
  
"With another girl"

  
  
" _Oh_ " 

  
  
Momo hated that look of pity.

  
  
"Don't worry about me, ok?"

  
  
"Of course I do, silly. Just... Don't do drugs because of a girl, yeah?"

  
  
Dahyun was too pure for this world. How did Sana end up dating her?

  
  
"I won't, Dahyunnie. Thanks for breakfast, but I gotta go"

  
  
"Already?"

  
  
"Yeah, take care of Sana, will you?"

  
  
Dahyun sighed. "I will..."

  
  
Momo planted a kiss on the younger girl's cheek and left. 

  
\--

* * *

  
_hey, wanna meet up?_

 _grab lunch or smthn?_  
**11:33**

* * *

  
  
Chaeyoung texted her and sent a restaurant location near campus. Momo went, even though all she wanted to do was stay at home and be cranky. Maybe Chaeyoung could take things off of her mind.

  
  
"Momo! Over here!" Chaeyoung almost screamed from inside the restaurant when she spotted the Japanese girl outside. Everyone stared at her, but she didn't seem to notice or mind.

  
  
"Hello, there" Momo sat down across from Chaeyoung. The place was nice, not too fancy, but nice either way.

  
  
"I've already ordered, is that ok? Don't worry, I got us the best dish they have here"

  
  
She was right. It was delicious. Whatever Italian pasta it was, it was heavenly.

 

\--

 

"Why the long face?" Chaeyoung asked after she finished eating. They both ate in silence, so it was nice to have an icebreaker.

 

Momo was impressed at how fast Chaeyoung ate – not as fast as her, but still.

 

“My face is normal”

 

“Yeah, sure” the younger girl teased, not buying it.

 

“So, um, what’s up between you and Jeongyeon, huh?” Momo tried changing the subject. It seemed to work because Chaeyoung looked like she went to another place inside her mind. She thought a lot about Jeongyeon, clearly.

 

“Oh, nothing really. It’s just…”

 

Momo arched her brows, encouraging her friend to elaborate.

 

Chaeyoung chuckled nervously. “Don’t tell her anything, ok? But I tried, you know, going on a date with her and stuff, but she wouldn’t stop talking about Nayeon. She’s not even here and Jeongyeon seems to have eyes only for her. I don’t mind really. She’s totally whipped”

 

“What? Jeongyeon and Nayeon? They are roommates and best friends, they wouldn’t-”. It clicked inside Momo’s head. The way Jeongyeon eyes glistened whenever Nayeon was brought up in conversation, how hurt she looked when Nayeon drew away from any physical contact between the two. Yeah, she was whipped. She fell into the whole ‘in love with your best friend’ trope. “ _Oh_ ”.

 

“See? I just wouldn’t take Jeongyeon as that type of lesbian. But, you know, everyone goes through that”

 

“Huh, I never thought of it that way. Jesus Christ, my best friends are so dumb”

 

“Yeah, they are”. Chaeyoung chuckled.

 

They moved the conversation into safe topics, not too personal and easy to discuss. It was nice. Chaeyoung was funny and did a great job at distracting Momo.

 

That was all she was doing the past month anyway. Distracting herself.

 

Momo didn’t notice, but they both fell quiet. The older one lost in her own thoughts and Chaeyoung observing her, amused.

 

“You should just talk to her, you know? Instead of complimenting her socks”. Chaeyoung broke her train of thoughts.

 

“What? H- How did you know?”

 

“Mina and I are best friends. She’s not good at the whole opening up thing, but she tells me some stuff. Just talk to her, dumb-dumb. There’s no secret about it”

 

Momo chuckled. It wasn’t that easy. Was it? “How enlightening, dear friend”

 

“ _Dear_ friend? Ok, we’re stepping up here. Don’t you think we’re going too fast?”

 

Momo rolled her eyes. “Shut up. And buy me some desserts. That’s what good friends do”

 

“Jesus, by dinner we’ll be best friends”

 

 --

 

“Nayeon?”

 

“Just let me, uh… get settled”. Nayeon was looking for a quiet place. Momo could see her getting comfortable on a couch through FaceTime. “All set, girly. What’s up? Are you crying? What- what time is it over there?”

 

“Um, it’s, uh, 10 p.m” Momo managed to say.

 

“Shouldn’t you be asleep? Don’t you have class tomorrow?”

 

“Yeah, I guess”

 

“Are you ok?”

 

Momo chuckled. She was clearly crying. It was obvious she wasn’t ok. “Do I look ok?”

 

“What happened?” Nayeon breathed, worry lacing her words and gaze.

 

“Nothing, it’s just… I’ve been think about her a lot today, and I don’t know” Momo trailed off.

 

“Thinking about who, Momo?”

 

“About Mina” the younger girl said in between sniffles.

 

“Did she do anything?”

 

And that’s how Momo started telling her best friend everything. She didn’t spare any details, not to Nayeon. It felt good opening up like this and feeling heard and important. It was hard to find people like this nowadays. Momo hated when people tricked her into telling about her personal life just to gain something out of it; or when they pretended to care about her, but when she needed help and a shoulder to cry on, they’d dismiss her. She could only trust not even a handful of friends. She didn’t have many, anyway.

 

“Gosh. It’s late. I’m sorry for keeping you from enjoying your vacation, I’ll leave alone now”

 

“Don’t say stuff like that, Momoring. You know I’m here for you, right?”

 

The nickname left a sour taste on Momo’s throat, but Naeyon didn’t know that.

 

“Right. Thank you, Nayeon”

 

“No problem, sweetie. Love you!”

 

“Love you too. And, hey, when you come back, please make a move on Jeongyeon”

 

“Wh- what are you talking about? We- we don’t-“

 

“Uh huh. I need to sleep, bye!”

 

Momo ended the call with a smirk plastered on her face. God, she really missed Nayeon and teasing her.

 

 --

 

“What would Nayeon say?”

 

“Huh?” Momo was getting tired of being pulled out of whatever anxious train of thought or daydream she was having.

 

“Nayeon is usually the one who gives you pep talks and encourages you and stuff. What would she say right now?” Jeongyeon was one hell of a friend. Momo felt bad for not getting close to her sooner.

 

“Uh, I don’t know. Maybe something aggressive but filled with love”

 

“Ok. Then get your butt out of here, Hirai, and be brave for once in your life”. Jeongyeon slapped her butt, pushing her forward and torwards Mina. Yeah, that was spot on Nayeon.

 

Momo then realized what she was about to do. Talk to Mina? Who gave her this idea? Oh yeah, Chaeyoung did. She’d kick her butt later. She was even giving her encouraging thumbs up from across the room. That kid was unbelievable.

 

“Momo?”

 

She was so lost in her thoughts – for what seemed like the 20th time that day – that she didn’t notice she was already invading Mina’s space. She was standing right in front of her and maybe she was quiet for way too long because Mina looked at her in a weird way. Was it worryingly?

 

“Um, hi, Mina”. Momo’s throat felt clogged. She was starting to panic.

 

_Get a grip, Hirai._

 

“Hi. Did you… need anything?”

 

“Yeah… Could we, like, maybe talk?”

 

The bell rang. The professor entered not even a second later. It was like this school didn’t want for them to have a normal conversation.

 

“Text me later?”

 

Momo could only nod before going to sit next to Jeongyeon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know what i'm doing anymore

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it :)
> 
> also, english is not my first language, so sorry for any mistakes


End file.
